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Lani · 03-05-2008, 08:53 AM

you elbowed me in the heart

flowers fell from my mouth
- limited world
  - rat on a wheel
    - can we sleep a little deeper
      - wake up in a cave
        shit it's 11:30
        meet up with you in spider webs of complacency
        i'm not stuck
        your no spider
        diluted to thin watery blob
        no substance
        whenever whatever
        i am trained

crescentfresh · 03-13-2008, 05:37 PM

Yay, you put your poem back up! :slaugh:

I like the imagery -- particularly the concept of being "elbowed in the heart" for starters. I'm still wondering what "can we sleep a little deeper" means, but I like that I'm wondering. Also, that was a bold move visually slanting the text and I like it as well.

P.S. The WT admins moved my poem to here.

Ulalume · 03-14-2008, 08:04 AM

Ooh. I really like the choice "you elbowed me in the heart." Very nice.

Thank you so much for sharing. I enjoyed reading this.

***tokermom*** · 03-14-2008, 08:07 AM

Very imaginative Lani-I liked it!

***The Hills*** · 03-15-2008, 01:50 AM

Very nice..Keep them coming.

camcam · 03-23-2008, 10:54 PM

very nice! :)

Lani · 04-10-2008, 11:11 AM

softly crying
faith undying

proof of purchase
asleep in bed

spoon feed me lies
all the slight untruths

pull the weed
and not the root

hurt me politely
so i might over react
what a thesbian i've become

curtain call
black and blue soul

**CRISPYBUD** · 04-10-2008, 11:22 AM

hey Lani , Nice work .

03-05-2008, 08:53 AM	#1 (permalink)
Lani "Let the monsters see you smile" Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: In a magical canyon Co-Op: no Vendor: no Patient: yes Posts: 519 Rep Power: 23188	A poem with no title.Post untitled poems here. you elbowed me in the heart flowers fell from my mouth limited world rat on a wheel can we sleep a little deeper wake up in a cave shit it's 11:30 meet up with you in spider webs of complacency i'm not stuck your no spider diluted to thin watery blob no substance whenever whatever i am trained Last edited by Lani; 03-13-2008 at 01:18 PM..

03-13-2008, 05:37 PM	#2 (permalink)
crescentfresh what deaner was talkin' about... Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Antelope Valley Co-Op: NO Vendor: NO Patient: YES Posts: 179 Rep Power: 40	Re: A poem with no title Yay, you put your poem back up! :slaugh: I like the imagery -- particularly the concept of being "elbowed in the heart" for starters. I'm still wondering what "can we sleep a little deeper" means, but I like that I'm wondering. Also, that was a bold move visually slanting the text and I like it as well. P.S. The WT admins moved my poem to here.

03-14-2008, 08:04 AM	#3 (permalink)
Ulalume Come to the Dark Side. We have cookies. Join Date: Nov 2007 Co-Op: No Vendor: No Patient: Yes Posts: 186 Rep Power: 143	Re: A poem with no title Ooh. I really like the choice "you elbowed me in the heart." Very nice. Thank you so much for sharing. I enjoyed reading this. Ulalume says.."Under the spreading chestnut tree I sold you and you sold me: There lie they, and here lie we Under the spreading chestnut tree."

03-14-2008, 08:07 AM	#4 (permalink)
*tokermom* Smokie Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: on top of a small mountain Co-Op: no Vendor: no Patient: yes Posts: 4,566 Rep Power: 498300	Re: A poem with no title Very imaginative Lani-I liked it! tokermom says.. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Questions, Problems, Concerns - Contact the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Center To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

03-15-2008, 01:50 AM	#5 (permalink)
*The Hills* WT Advanced Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Co-Op: Yes Vendor: NO Patient: YES Posts: 573 Rep Power: 5244	Re: A poem with no title Very nice..Keep them coming. The Hills says..I work for The Hills Caregivers.

03-23-2008, 10:54 PM	#6 (permalink)
camcam Hi, Im New! Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: OC Co-Op: no Vendor: no Patient: yes Posts: 11 Rep Power: 0	Re: A poem with no title very nice! :)

04-10-2008, 11:11 AM	#7 (permalink)
Lani "Let the monsters see you smile" Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: In a magical canyon Co-Op: no Vendor: no Patient: yes Posts: 519 Rep Power: 23188	Re: A poem with no title softly crying faith undying proof of purchase asleep in bed spoon feed me lies all the slight untruths pull the weed and not the root hurt me politely so i might over react what a thesbian i've become curtain call black and blue soul

04-10-2008, 11:22 AM	#8 (permalink)
CRISPYBUD Banned Join Date: Mar 2008 Co-Op: NO Vendor: NO Patient: YES Posts: 157 Rep Power: 0	Re: A poem with no title hey Lani , Nice work .

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