[goof troop]

so.. im hating 2009 thus far. Me and my boyfriend of 6 months broke up 2 weeks ago (more like he broke my heart). I am so crazy about him and I haven't ever had a difficult time dealing with a break up. I had anxiety issues before, but now I was having full blown panic attacks, i have no appetite (ive lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks).
This weekend my grandmother who has lived with my immediate family for 5 years passed away. We were very close and although she was 83 and her body simply gave out, I am devastated.
To TOP IT ALL OFF my dog (13 yrs old) has an inoperable tumor on her snout and will probably be gone soon too.


anyway. i haven't been able to sleep much (not falling asleep till 3am and waking up at 7am when i dont need to). when i wake up i start crying cuz i miss my boyfriend... then i feel guilty cuz he's not worth my tears when my gramms just died... i went to the doctor on friday and she prescribed me lexapro.. i just feel stoned all day and its really difficult for me to start crying (i still feel the emotions but i just cant produce tears - like i'll just be wailing without crying) its SO weird.

anybody know if smoking will have a different effect if i'm taking ssri's?

any ideas to get me out of this stupid bed? what do i do? all i can do is think about one thing or the other! and my best friend wont return my phone calls. yeah. life sucks.

[pelagic21]

Originally Posted by goof troop

so.. im hating 2009 thus far. Me and my boyfriend of 6 months broke up 2 weeks ago (more like he broke my heart). I am so crazy about him and I haven't ever had a difficult time dealing with a break up. I had anxiety issues before, but now I was having full blown panic attacks, i have no appetite (ive lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks).
This weekend my grandmother who has lived with my immediate family for 5 years passed away. We were very close and although she was 83 and her body simply gave out, I am devastated.
To TOP IT ALL OFF my dog (13 yrs old) has an inoperable tumor on her snout and will probably be gone soon too.


anyway. i haven't been able to sleep much (not falling asleep till 3am and waking up at 7am when i dont need to). when i wake up i start crying cuz i miss my boyfriend... then i feel guilty cuz he's not worth my tears when my gramms just died... i went to the doctor on friday and she prescribed me lexapro.. i just feel stoned all day and its really difficult for me to start crying (i still feel the emotions but i just cant produce tears - like i'll just be wailing without crying) its SO weird.

anybody know if smoking will have a different effect if i'm taking ssri's?

any ideas to get me out of this stupid bed? what do i do? all i can do is think about one thing or the other! and my best friend wont return my phone calls. yeah. life sucks.

First of all you probably shouldnt take those pills. Keep it natural. You obviously have an mmj card. So use it. Go to Suite 215 in van nuys and pick up their green crack. It will relax you as well as keep your mind off things. Thats what you really need to do..... meds..... ENEMY. Dependency. And what helps keep mmj underground.

Keep your chin up. When it rains it pours, thats the story of my 2008.

[Aussieblue07]

One, I don't know what ssri's is, I'm new to the site. Also, stop feeling sorry for yourself. Doing that just keeps you where you are now and where you are, is not happy. All I can say is get up, take a shower, and do something different everyday, or start something new. Give yourself obligations that way it helps taking your mind off things. Know that what has happened has happened, as hard as it is to believe, know that it has. Know too that your ex is winning when you do this to yourself, never let another get the best of you. You have to be strong, and whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger and learn from this experience and move on. You can do it! Make a day to go out and get dressed up, and have a good time with friends. You will realize that what your putting yourself through is silly, your worth so much more. Good luck, hope I helped, if even just a little.....

[LocalBud]

So sorry for your losses.
Lexapro increases your serotonin level. And you have to ramp up to it being effectual.
You get the same benefits from exercise.
I personally would avoid the antidepressants.
Mourn the loss of your grandmother and you will get over your lost relationship.
And yes..... use your mmj rec
and surround yourself with family and friends ... there is no quick fix.
You have to go through it, and you will.
I hope my words help!!

[Bemysnugglemate]

Here's a good venting thread on WT

http://www.weedtracker.com/forums/sh...314#post757314

It's still helping me.

Originally Posted by goof troop

so.. im hating 2009 thus far. Me and my boyfriend of 6 months broke up 2 weeks ago (more like he broke my heart). I am so crazy about him and I haven't ever had a difficult time dealing with a break up. I had anxiety issues before, but now I was having full blown panic attacks, i have no appetite (ive lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks).
This weekend my grandmother who has lived with my immediate family for 5 years passed away. We were very close and although she was 83 and her body simply gave out, I am devastated.
To TOP IT ALL OFF my dog (13 yrs old) has an inoperable tumor on her snout and will probably be gone soon too.


anyway. i haven't been able to sleep much (not falling asleep till 3am and waking up at 7am when i dont need to). when i wake up i start crying cuz i miss my boyfriend... then i feel guilty cuz he's not worth my tears when my gramms just died... i went to the doctor on friday and she prescribed me lexapro.. i just feel stoned all day and its really difficult for me to start crying (i still feel the emotions but i just cant produce tears - like i'll just be wailing without crying) its SO weird.

anybody know if smoking will have a different effect if i'm taking ssri's?

any ideas to get me out of this stupid bed? what do i do? all i can do is think about one thing or the other! and my best friend wont return my phone calls. yeah. life sucks.

[codeman420]

"when it rains it pours"
"bad luck comes in 3's"

etc.
etc.
etc.

The bottom line is, you will get through it. No matter how hard it seems now, you will get through it. That's all there is to it. Now go and do just that. You owe it to yourself.

Not trying to be cold, but a tough mental attitude can go a long way. Grab your problems by the neck and kick their ass out. (metaphorically of course :)


I am very sorry about your grandmother. And your dog.


you will get through it. :) take care.

[modern_talkin]

Psalm 18

"I love you, O Lord, my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise,
and I am saved from my enemies.

In my distress I called to the Lord;
I cried to my God for help.
From his temple he heard my voice;
my cry came before him, into his ear."

Sister, when all else fails, prayer is the key. Trust in him, he who provides you with peace and comfort. You will never be shaken when you are under the wings of the Almighty.

[trainwreck21]

Originally Posted by goof troop

so.. im hating 2009 thus far. Me and my boyfriend of 6 months broke up 2 weeks ago (more like he broke my heart). I am so crazy about him and I haven't ever had a difficult time dealing with a break up. I had anxiety issues before, but now I was having full blown panic attacks, i have no appetite (ive lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks).
This weekend my grandmother who has lived with my immediate family for 5 years passed away. We were very close and although she was 83 and her body simply gave out, I am devastated.
To TOP IT ALL OFF my dog (13 yrs old) has an inoperable tumor on her snout and will probably be gone soon too.


anyway. i haven't been able to sleep much (not falling asleep till 3am and waking up at 7am when i dont need to). when i wake up i start crying cuz i miss my boyfriend... then i feel guilty cuz he's not worth my tears when my gramms just died... i went to the doctor on friday and she prescribed me lexapro.. i just feel stoned all day and its really difficult for me to start crying (i still feel the emotions but i just cant produce tears - like i'll just be wailing without crying) its SO weird.

anybody know if smoking will have a different effect if i'm taking ssri's?

any ideas to get me out of this stupid bed? what do i do? all i can do is think about one thing or the other! and my best friend wont return my phone calls. yeah. life sucks.

first of alll... im really mad cuz i just typed out a long reply and i lost it SOMEHOW..
anyways let me try to do this again..

i was in somewhat of a simular situation as you not too long ago...

Although its gonna take TIME... heres something that really helped me through it all...

I was in bed just like you, didnt feel as though i had any reason to get up. lol like i reallllly didnt get up.. at all...

Anyways, a family friend came to visit me, because she heard what was going on. She sat there and told me all the horrible things that were going on in her life and she was in a LOT of trouble...the news was soo disturbing, i got up..took a shower, got dressed, and i went with her to help her through her problems, she kept me pretty busy, i didnt have a chance to think about all the things i had gone through. Slowly but surely.. it worked.. im completely healed now.

So the trick is to stayyy busssyyyyyyyy!! I know what your thinking.."theres just so much going on, how can i NOT thinki about it? The thoughts wont leave me alone"...

get that out of ur head and stay motivated, concentrate on something other than yourself. it will help.

and dont take that thing u got prescribed, they gave me somehting like that too..keep it natural

[Eazy]

...what they don't teach you in school is; experiencing these deep emotions are necessary to building a strong personality. If you can't grieve deeply, how can you ever love deeply? If you can't be depressed, ...how can you know elation? Go with it. Sort things out, then get out of bed. Just eat right, exercise as best you can, you have to build up to the exercising lifestyle VERY slowly if you want to maintain it. Exercise can get real boring, real fast if you over do it. Also, and this really pisses me off, this was/is heavily censored in America; our bodies have THC receptors throughout our entire bodies with the exception of around critical organs, which is why you can't over-dose on THC, your critical organs keep functioning during the heavy sedation induced by THC. And, our brains produce cannabinoids. The only time we need THC is when we don't have enough nutrients in our bodies to produce enough cannabinoids to keep us calm and happy. This occurs when we are under a lot of stress, are injured, or are ill. Why was this censored? ...no duh, doctors won't make much money if people can use a homeopathic remedy to treat nearly all ailments before they develop into worse problems even THC can't combat (toxins, too much stress, poor nutrition).

You may not be sleeping well due to something that has nothing to do with your life situation. So, you may want to get a sleep study done if the insomnia persists, if you have a good doctor and good insurance or can just afford it. MediCal does do sleep studies if you need public health insurance, ...welcome to Canada, ey.

Of course, it could be your life situation and your body isn't producing enough cannabinoids due to the stress. The SSRI's could be making your symptoms worse. Those side-effects concern me, any side effects do...other than getting pleasantly clouded as a side-effect of mmj. That side-effect IS NOT permanent whereas the damage done by all pharmaceuticals is permanent. SSRI's are particularly damaging and usually permanent. So, definitely stop the SSRI's with your doctor's approval and according to the instructions provided by the pharmacy. SSRI's should be a last line of defense, mmj first! Always. Experiment with a few known strains of mmj that work for your symptoms. Don't forget to experiment with both smoke and edibles. See if mmj works. Give it some time. If it don't work, you'll know it, not need it and will want try something else.

If you have a sleep disorder, which most mmj patients I know do in one way or another, with the proper treatment for sleep, if anything outside of mmj is needed for treatment such as respiratory devices, the mmj should cure your insomnia and make your days a lot better to start with, then a little bit of exercise always helps. Good nutrition, it all ads up over time.

Also, hemp protein powder and hemp milk, super brain food. It's the perfect protein and it's high in Omega 3 and 6, and it's got trace minerals found in no other plant that are essential to human brain function, another censored fact. You'll find hemp products on Amazon.com or at better health food stores, get the organic, cold milled hemp seed and hemp milk from Canada -- they have good quality control and excellent products. You will feel and look better no matter what. Hemp food is amazing.

whew. I'm hungry!

[stanley]

My sympathies for your losses.

You have been given all kinds of advice, and I dont claim to have any extra secrets to help.

Stay active. Get out of the house. Go shopping. Clean the closets. Go to the movies.....but stay busy.

The only thing that HEALS your wounds is time...and time goes by slowly when you are depressed or hurting... staying active, busy, even if it is mindless stuff, will occupy some of that time.... Time will allow you to put all these things in their proper perspective... and it IS just a matter of regaining your healthy perspective.

Yes, marijuana CAN have different "effects" for some folks when taking SSRI's. Lexapro is very selective, effecting primarily seratonin with minimal effects on norepinephrine and dopamine neuronal reuptake.

There isnt a lot of good science on this, thanks to the ban on medical research, but MMJ does have an effect on seratonin levels in the brain, and as such, any pill you take that has that purpose can be impacted.

This is a MMJ web site, so folks here will tell you to stop taking pills.... take their advice VERY CAREFULLY, and ONLY if it makes good medical sense. We do not know your individual case history, or your medical condition, and any medical advice you get needs to come from folks that have ALL the needed info...

I have been down the path of the SSRI's and most of the other "psych" meds they have in their arsenal.... I have PTSD, and the related depression and anxiety that often comes with it... I have found that careful daily doses of MMJ, (I use edibles a lot) actually work better for me than the pills... but EVERYONE is a little different, and what works for me might not work for you...

Your instincts were right.... you are hurting and you reached out to this little community... and you will receive a lot of support here.... but you need to get out of the house for some face to face time too....

Stay focused, and dont give up hope... things will get better...

[BrattonBasher]

What Stanley says!

[BrattonBasher]

And BTW Goof Troop is a really cool handle. I remember when Mad Magazine did a parody of the TV show F-Troop they called it Goof Troop.

[Kushism_girl]

I'm going to tell you what my dad always told me when I had boy troubles.

"<insert embarrassing term of endearment that will never leave my parents house here>,That guy is an idiot. Any guy that doesn't appreciate you while he has you is a full blown idiot. And you shouldn't subject yourself to an idiot like that. I don't even want you with a jackass like that."

And here is my perspective: Look at the bright side. That's one less a$$hole that you don't have to deal with anymore. From the looks of it, he does seem like a douche. Now with your experience you can spot more douche bags and you know what to avoid. As a woman, you have to date the bad ones in order for you to appreciate the good one when he does come along. And I am saying he's a bad one because the good one won't cause you all this hard ache and pain.

Sounds like you need a girls night out and Sex and the City night. Call your girlfriends or gay friends.

[goof troop]

wow wow wow wow. you are all wonderful. i never thought i'd have any feedback and all of you took the time to help a stranger. i'm up again at 7am.. no surprise there.. but i fell asleep at 9! probably because i was laying in bed since 2 but hey at least i got some damn sleep!!! and i did cry again.. but only because i realize how selfless people can be. i have hope!

for all who advise quitting my new meds.. mmj has been nothing but MARVELOUS for treating my chronic knee pain, but absolutely TRIGGERS my anxiety and isolation. i thought it was the answer to getting through the next few months.. but last week i smoked a 1/4 by myself!!! i was constantly medicated and sat in my room getting frustrated cuz the munchies never came. (and i've always been bad with the munchies.. i gained 30 lbs my freshman year when i started smoking).

when comparing the prices of these two medications (and factoring in that my parents have no clue about the mmj) i spend abooooout oh i dunno.. $80 a week on mj and the lexapro is $30??? my doctor asked if i'd been "self-medicating" and i told her i smoked a little.. ha.. and she said i could continue but the medication is supposed to take the place of it. so maybe the pills will save me a little cash cuz they make me stoned anyway. this is nothing permanent. only to get through this slump, but i'll always be an avid smoker. haha.

i never would have spilled my guts out to a public forum before, but ive never felt this before either. i feel like my ex stole 10lbs of my body away from me. i only weigh 115 right now... and im normally around 130.. if i get the munchies alot

but yesterday i made myself an AMAZING baked potato with chili and cheese.. didn't get out of bed for dinner.. but i'll make up for it today.

thank you all for your kind words and thoughts. i'll keep them with me and remember im not alone!

[onecrazyfoo]

Damn ,That baked potato sounds so good!!On a serious note....the loss of you grandmother was probably the most serious of your problems(sorry) and your pooch will be ok...WHAT YOU PROFESS IS WHAT COMES TO PASS...think as positive as you can about it no matter how bad it seems...and as far as the dumb-ass who isn't in your lifeanymore...leave it to the birds,chickadee...his loss not yours.You'll look back in ayear and kick yourself in the ass for even wasting a tear on his ass...Good luck kid.

[Bemysnugglemate]

Glad you starting to feel again.... As to the medication when I started going to pick up my meds I used to only think one way. Now I am starting slowly to remember that like in the Dr.'s offices (not all medication is the same). Working from this notion I started talking to the Bud-Tenders since they are there to assist me with my needs. There are many different strains that work for different aliments.
I too couldn't understand why sometimes I would smoke and not get munchies, or other times I felt dragging. Now I am not any type of near a specialist but. Indica's, Sativa's, and so on....
If you want the munchies you can still have them....:slaugh: if you need meds to help with certain ailments. you should try this thread on WT. and check out some of the other internal sites. WT'ers are here to help. I found out myself many times...

Health & Wellness
http://www.weedtracker.com/forums/fo...173.html?f=173

Learning to hear your body and what best works for you....

Have a good morning..afternoon...and evening.....

[goof troop]

So I'm skipping Chemistry to drive to Malibu and hit up G.A.M. to relax on their couch and watch the fishies. i'll give myself a couple days off class this week and be back at it on thursday.

maybe i'll find a sativa that gives me some motivation! sheesh.
i dont think i should be exercising though... like you guys suggested.. at least not till i gain some of this weight back.

[BabyBoomer]

Originally Posted by goof troop

So I'm skipping Chemistry to drive to Malibu and hit up G.A.M. to relax on their couch and watch the fishies. i'll give myself a couple days off class this week and be back at it on thursday.

maybe i'll find a sativa that gives me some motivation! sheesh.
i dont think i should be exercising though... like you guys suggested.. at least not till i gain some of this weight back.

Glad to see you are doing a little bit better and really glad that you are getting out and facing the day.

Just try and move your body around some, a walk, or something, just to keep it going. Not to lose weight, just to get everything moving again.

And maybe talking to a therapist can help. Is there one associated with your school?

You know you can come here, we will listen, bless you and may your challenges get easier for you to handle.

We care.

[Jeffster]

Hi goof troop, I'm sorry to read about your problems, but like you, I also got an uplifting feeling from reading all the well intentioned responses from other WTers in this thread.

I'm not familiar with lexapro, but if it is a SSRI, then I do use one as well, Paxil. I've been on that for 7 years or so, but only started with MMJ back in April 2008. So, my experience is backwards of your. I was already on a SSRI, then added MMJ. But I used MJ many years ago, loved it back then, and am pretty sure I remember what I liked about MJ back then, and what I like about it now. So, my experience, FWIW, is that the MMJ does do just what I want it to do on top of the SSRI that is in my system on a daily basis.

Hopefully in your case, as the days go by, you will feel better about yourself, and have your problems in a more comfortable emotional zone. Then you may want to try easing off the lexapro. I'd say follow your doctor's advice and help for now, and then talk with your doctor again when and if it's time to get off the lexapro. I wish you all the best in coming through all this! You sound like a wonderful person to me, and may you feel ever more happiness in your life as the days go on.

[PainFree2008]

You know...sometimes we just need to feel bad. You've been through some pretty heavy experiences lately, and you and your body need to process those feelings. My advice is to accept how you feel, journal about it, and let the "grieving" follow its course. It's normal to cry and have trouble sleeping after traumatic events.

Use MMJ or meds to assist you, but not to stop you from feeling. Feelings are just like food...they are in our bodies and must "run the course".

And don't worry too much...this too shall pass, and you'll have an entirely new set of problems to deal with 6 months from now. :) In other words, life DOES go on.

Take care, and PM if you want to talk. :)

[modern_talkin]

Originally Posted by PainFree2008

You know...sometimes we just need to feel bad. You've been through some pretty heavy experiences lately, and you and your body need to process those feelings. My advice is to accept how you feel, journal about it, and let the "grieving" follow its course. It's normal to cry and have trouble sleeping after traumatic events.

Use MMJ or meds to assist you, but not to stop you from feeling. Feelings are just like food...they are in our bodies and must "run the course".

And don't worry too much...this too shall pass, and you'll have an entirely new set of problems to deal with 6 months from now. :) In other words, life DOES go on.

Take care, and PM if you want to talk. :)

This is great advice

[goof troop]

hi guys! i just figured i'd pop in and let you know im doing a bit better. the lexapro brought back my healthy appetite and all my blood tests came back perfect! if theres one thing i can be happy about, it's that i am healthy.

im at my parents house right now and it feels so empty and quiet without my grandmas game shows or her oxygen machine bubbling all day... so weird.

my dogs tumor seems to have gone down, but we don't expect it to go away. poor thing... she had SUCH a gorgeous face till that massive thing popped up. im spending as much time as i can laying with her and spoiling her.

anyway.. i wanted to thank you guys again for your support. when im down and feel like nothing will make my life better, i just think of this little community of stoners who love to love and have only good intentions.

[tokermom]

All I can add to all the wters'wonderful support already posted- is that Time is
going to make things easier. Take GOOD care of YOU & Hang in There! OX

[Eazy]

Originally Posted by goof troop

hi guys! i just figured i'd pop in and let you know im doing a bit better. the lexapro brought back my healthy appetite and all my blood tests came back perfect! if theres one thing i can be happy about, it's that i am healthy.

im at my parents house right now and it feels so empty and quiet without my grandmas game shows or her oxygen machine bubbling all day... so weird.

my dogs tumor seems to have gone down, but we don't expect it to go away. poor thing... she had SUCH a gorgeous face till that massive thing popped up. im spending as much time as i can laying with her and spoiling her.

anyway.. i wanted to thank you guys again for your support. when im down and feel like nothing will make my life better, i just think of this little community of stoners who love to love and have only good intentions.

Right on!

[Smokus Cannabis]

I take Zoloft and Trazadone every day, plus I smoke MMJ every day, usually. The combination works very well together, but you have to smoke it in moderation (I'm smoking about a gram of hash a week now). The pills make me lethargic as it is, so I usually smoke only at night after my day is done. I have found, since adding MMJ to my psychiatric meds, that I suffer far less than before. If you are having a full blown breakdown, don't let anybody shoot down the pill meds. They can be helpful, but they are addictive (I don't care what the doctor says) physically in some ways. You've been dealt some serious blows all at once. Just go forward as best you can. Exercise, eat right, take good care of yourself. I can't function without pill meds, but the MMJ helps me very much. Hope everything gets better soon. It will, just be patient and as calm as you can.